Love

One of my favorite words is love. I love to love. I love to love my husband, kids, friends, and clients, dancing, camping, books, music, movies, plays, nature, food and on and on. February gets a lot of hype about love due to Valentine’s Day, but there are several types of love, not just romantic love. 

Here are 8 types of love:

• Philia — Affectionate Love. Philia is love without romantic attraction and occurs between friends or family members.
• Pragma — Enduring Love
• Storge — Familiar Love 
• Eros — Romantic Love 
• Ludus — Playful Love 
• Mania — Obsessive Love 
• Philautia — Self Love 
• Agape — Selfless Love

The past two years have been TIRING, exhausting really. We are all living with so much change, pivots, decisions, weariness, and compassion fatigue. Often when my clients start working with me, they are TIRED! They feel frustrated, confused and often are lacking confidence on what is next. 

I think LOVE is a big part of going through a life transition. More than ever people are in a constant LIFE TRANSITION. I am seeing marriages end, people are moving and more than ever people are asking what is my purpose and how can I take the next steps toward that. My answer, start with a self-love practice. Go within, the real, true answers are within. This is when I turn the focus to PHILAUTIA, OR SELF-LOVE. I coach my clients to go inward, to pay attention, and ask what they truly need. 

This can often be met with dismissiveness or greater confusion, so I always suggest starting small. Sit, put your hand on your heart, and breathe. What do you notice? What does your body feel like? What sensations are happening? What are your thoughts? By just doing this daily for 5 minutes you will start to build a relationship with yourself and learn what you most need and desire. The practice is simple, but the consistent execution can be more challenging. 

We live in a world of doing rather than BEING. We live in a world of focusing on the external rather than the INTERNAL.  So it really does take slowing down and paying attention to cultivate more self-connection and ultimate self-love. 

Just like any other relationship, plant, or animal, we need to give ourselves gentle attention. We need to listen within and give ourselves lots of nurturing. 

It is not just important but truly vital that we go within and ask, what do I need, right now at this moment? Do I need to cry? Do I need to scream? Do I need to move my body? Do I need a hug? Do I need to journal my racing thoughts? Do I need to call a parent, friend, or loved one? Do I need to rest?